(A wet fire, one of boiling water, can destroy just as much as an open flame.)
[Yet some inflame others and are surprised to be burned by something and they can't find fire anywhere]
{What are the signs of "boiling over" and what can be done about it?}
(3-28-2014)
Draft 2 Publish
Yet another draft from many years ago that never made it to the world; at the time that I was coming up with these unfinished drafts there was an inability to continue. Perhaps the reason I couldn't continue was because these posts weren't meant for the zeitgeist of the time.
Regardless of timing being appropriate, there is a strong need for explanations of certain questions. The questions I propose aren't new ideas and the problems I'm articulating are just as old. I would call my delay to finish a result of my own immaturity. Even though it is more probable that I refused to speak on something I didn't feel I had enough authority in experience to suggest a solution.
Six years later I have a very strong opinion about solutions to a problem anyone could talk about. After all, the problem I speak about is more arbitrary than a specific event. The psychology of it all is too broad and too inclusive to narrow down any one particular problem--like trying to define something in a dream not clearly seen and therefore your memory is unreliable.
One aspect of my memory that I can say is totally reliable is my memory of what people have a tendency to do when it comes to me. Such as a preference or a tolerance.. Though I only remember the behavior, I have no idea what the intentions were. Intentions be damned, I don't care.
As the new year approaches there's a lot of people talking about peace and unity and mending of wounds and the like. Though these things are not inherently negative or disproportionate, I feel that there's some kind of misrepresentation going on here.
It's as though the most important thing to most people these days is how much they can be a victim.
All the talk goes hand in hand with a prevalent issue that is disproportionately handled. It's the whole symbolism with destroying an ant hill with a bazooka. But without saying such a thing as to insinuate that the problem itself is miniscule in comparison to ourselves.
No.. What I mean to insinuate is that we don't handle our solutions well. It's the wasteful bit of spending that government gets into that leads into much bigger issues, such as corruption. Albeit such issues are ever going.. Or should that properly be ongoing? I just can't stand to define it that way since it is obvious that the other part of the problem of corruption is that neutral and protective systems become weapons.
All I wanted for Christmas
Was to go back to work. Like, without these lockdown restrictions and all the nonsense behind it. I'm still amazed that we're having this debate in society when the reality is that we're not even in a position to be able to govern ourselves.
I know, crazy talk. Right? Where am I going with this?
The point I'm making is that there's all these things that everyone wants. All sorts of ways we're willing to go about getting the things we desire. But it isn't murder that I'm focusing on here, it is the end result nonetheless. We shouldn't be surprised though, it seems that unchecked issues always lead to a murderous conclusion. Kinda like what Master Yoda yammers on about, right?
I've found myself wanting plenty. I don't know that it is possible not to, outside of getting away from the very world that instigates so many of these desires. Much like being surrounded by a bunch of people who you admire and whom are giving you affection, but you are told to ignore. I'm not saying that it isn't possible, but I am suggesting that it's a sort of lunacy to expect it of someone.
But that's where this gets weird.
Because when we're talking about divine intervention, there's no need for conventionalism in anything.
GOD within the Boundaries
I've long struggled with the concept that God is invisible. But not nearly as much as the concept that there's some human-formed entity watching me and dictating onto my life. At least with God I feel that his invisibility isn't a condition for his involvement; weird statement, but it is rooted in experience.
This is not a theology discussion. I'm far from talking about what I think is going on or who I think has the idea the best. What I will admit is that I have to talk about this aspect of my belief structure or I wont be able to articulate the deeper meaning of my rant. But I'm not trying to convert your thinking as much as suggest a reason for others having an alternative form of thought.
Mine is pretty basic.. I think cause and effect explain most of everything in the world, but it isn't the ultimate explanation to existence or purpose. I think there's layers and levels to reality and the involvement of any one energy can be completely independent of some or all others, as evidenced in the physical sciences. So I think it is logical to presume that any higher power, be it reasonable or not, is consistent as evidenced by the consistency and interwoven interdependency of systems within the universe as a whole.
In the grand scheme of things.. I find it laughable to discredit the possibility of divine presence as opposed to argue possible dormancy.
But where does that leave me in the world that hates anything and everything yet nothing, simultaneously?
As a child and growing up I wrote off such a thing as the reason why the world is broken. It wasn't ever in the back of my mind, it was always in the front. I simply didn't look at it any other way and it was that I tried, in fact it was that I wanted to know why things were so obviously broken as opposed to meant to be... In an ever-decaying presence of survival. Perhaps this was the very thing that scared me into believing there is a God. Even more, it may be the reason why my drugged mental states didn't lead to a psychotic break; don't ask my family to confirm this, they'll argue I've either never been crazy or never found help.
That is a bit of comic relief. Trust me, I'm laughing about it when I think about it now.
This issue has been something that has set a sort of limitation on me. It is something I should consider. After many opportunities have passed me because I felt I wasn't being loyal, I should really consider what it is that I am and where I'm going.
This comes from a heart of thankfulness, it's best to take note that a lot of my decisions are made on the basis that I'm making bad decisions and need guidance.
2021 & Beyond
This whole Future-thought weft is getting old. It was a fun joke when 2015 was rolling around, to us nerds who grew up fantasizing about a world similar to what Marty McFly encountered in that half-baked sequel to a late 80's misnomer of reality.
Damn.. What a mouthful.
It's just... How funny it is to look at what we thought the future would look like, when we're finally in it. It's like those old sci-fi shows. I've always known you can't depict a world that doesn't exist, especially something tangible yet liquid like tomorrow. For even if it is disastrous, it's still a thing of inevitability and supreme importance.
I won't talk about tomorrow like I know what tomorrow brings or what I want to do. I've already known for quite some time not to talk like that. I hope many people learned the futility of such this year.